My wonderful dermatologist decided to throw out to me that I might have PCOS.
Her: "OH! You might have PCOS which is common in people with chronic acne...(words trail off as I begin to process what in the world she just said)"
Me: "PC..what? what?"
Her: "Oh PCOS, you know, that's Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome {oh, of course}--it's pretty common in women but it's just a possibility. You should talk to your gynecologist {Yeah we're besties, I'll shoot her a text}. So...I'm thinking we should try acctuane. {...yeah over my dad's dead body}"
Me: (in my head because she won't stop talking) "Cysts? What even is that exactly? In my ovaries? What does that mean? Wait accutane? WTF! Sure lady, sign me up."
{please catch the severe sarcasm...The background on miss dermatologist is a whole other story not worth mentioning. Moral of her story: she sucks.}
What is PCOS you ask? Look it up here. Sounds like a lot of fun, right?
So this began a month ago. I have had this looming cloud of possible PCOS without many answers from doctors, but just an excessive waiting game. Just when life got good again. Just when I am literally having the best weekends of my life. Life is funny. It couldn't let me just enjoy myself, but had to throw a curve ball. I guess I should be so fortunate that this {possible} bomb dropped in a particularly happy time in my life. That's just the way things go. But let me tell you one thing, I wouldn't change my summer for a second {and that's a story for another post}.
Well, one gyno visit and one hormone blood test later and we have reached today. The day for a pelvic ultrasound. An ultrasound? Aren't those for pregnant ladies? Yes, I thought the same thing. So they just rub the goo and little camera thing across your stomach, right? Again, that sounds like what I imagined walking into the hospital this morning. But oh no...they have to poke and prod your insides too. No big deal... Why did no one warn me about this? Why is the only info I have about PCOS still from webMD? {apart from my lack of asking questions due to shock}. I {supposedly} find out the results tomorrow, but reflecting on the way things have gone I doubt that will be the case. I would like to wave my white flag and let someone else win the waiting game. I'm definitely over it.
After my exam today I decided to celebrate. No more pity parties. I have come to realize that I am very thankful that no matter what the results are (PCOS or not) that it is not a death sentence in the least. As my level-headed sister put it "medical science will have (my) back." Who knew those words would be so comforting.
In order to celebrate, I bought a delectable breakfast sandwich from Homegrown along with a delicious coffee. Since the sun was just beginning to peak through the clouds, I went and sat at Kerry Park which overlooks the Seattle skyline. {Like so}
I consumed my sandwich, basked in the sun, sipped my coffee, and leisurely read The Poisonwood Bible {which I just began last night and am already enthralled}. I sat for about an hour watching the tourists roll in and out--snapping pictures from every angle and with every combination of fellow travelers. I also am going to bake, do laundry and probably go for a run--all some of my favorite things. After all these wonderful activities, I get to end the day reading at the park while sharing dinner with one of my favorite people. As much as I hated the thought of today, it might have just turned it into one of the best days of summer.
Today is a pleasant {and much needed} reminder that life is good. So incredibly good.
1 comment:
I'm really sorry to hear that you're going through medical woes. :( that is honestly the worst, especially with a not so great doctor. It sounds like you don't want to, but going on accutane isn't worth it. I was on it my senior year of high school and I had some horrible side effects.
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